For Art's Sake

I am no artist. Honestly, I do not know how to draw by freehand. I do not know how to play around with colors. Neither do I have those creative eyes nor imagination. Lastly, I just simply do not know how to be one. Ironically though, I do it for a living and it has been feeding me for the last 18 years.

As a young high school student, I was as scatterbrained as a dead cat. My only concern then for college was how to get into UP for the sake of not being strictly tied up with the traditional mini skirts and high heeled shoes from other schools. Luckily, I managed to be accepted and even luckier I was already enrolled when the Fine Arts Program adviser found out I had not been asked to take the required talent exam for all new students. Everyday for the next 5 years, I trembled each time I’d get into any drawing class. No matter how great my Techniques teacher was, I just didn’t have those gifted hands like other students had. A cocky teacher even embarrassed me in front of our class by saying, “What’s your problem? You don’t know how to draw?” I had to keep myself from asking him back “Is that why you’re an abstractionist yourself, Sir?” You could only imagine how relieved I was to finally get out of art school after 5 long years.

And so as expected, I have made a career in the field of arts, specifically as a graphic designer. I spent 4 tiresome but exciting years in the local advertising world. My perfectionist boss taught me how to get into the real world. I hardly remember anything I’ve created that she had ever praised. But despite those veiled rejections, I am still grateful to her for everything that I’ve learned in the business – aesthetically and professionally speaking – for I have come to love my chosen profession.

Oddly, my next 12 years were spent in an unexciting environment yet with an unusually energetic new boss. Each time I submitted an artwork, all I could hear from her is “That’s great!” – until it already made me puke! In fairness though, I also learned a lot from her and I will always be thankful as well.

I lost my job a month ago but I must say the aphorism is true – that when God closes the door, He opens windows – because a week after my last day, a supplier wanted to engage me on some lay outing projects. I had no other choice but to accept it in order to get by. The thing is, my client is rather strange. He asks me to create a new and replace their outdated logo, instructs me to go ahead and play around with anything I could come up with and when I show him my works, he bluntly tells me “Is this all you could do? You know, you should ask me what I want because you don’t exactly know what I want. Blah blah blah!” Yeah, right. “So what is it then that really you like, Sir?”

I am back in the real world, I guess. Or should I just say, “It’s a jungle out there!”